An Ode to Shopping: The Anti-Rant

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Too often in life we lose sight of life's simple pleasures, because there are far too many greedy dumb ass corporate CEOs who put profits [and by profits I mean obscene executive salaries that on average are 42 times greater than their lower level employees, plus golden parachute packages, stock options, and other benefits that lowly state employees such as myself could only dream of] ahead of the cardinal rule of business: [at least as far as I'm concerned] customer service is EVERYTHING. If you hadn't guessed it, I'm one of those customers. You know the type that really doesn't appreciate stores trying to run me for my money, and won't hesitate to complain about crap service/products and will gladly boycott an establishment if they suck. However, every once in a while, a retailer pleasantly surprises you. Well today I was pleasantly surprised, not once, but twice! But damned if I didn't earn it! This story started off on the rocks. See right what had happened was...I've been stalking this pair of boots since August. Just to be clear*, these boots are TO. DIE. FOR: high end, sexy, bold color, fit my anorexic baby calves like a glove--everything a boot snob/addict such as myself lives for. So after putting in my due diligence and waiting until I had the money for them [then spending that money on other more pressing needs] and waiting for them to be stocked in my size and color, it seemed today that my efforts were in vain.

Things started going downhill when I talked to  Zappos.com customer rep today and was told that the order of the boots in my size in color that I was expecting last week had been cancelled, and there were no pending future orders to restock. I was tempted to tell the rep online that that was an EPIC FAIL on the part of Zappos, and was fixin' to giver her a piece of my mind about it. But I decided against it, because at the end of the day, it wasn't going to change anything. So with an major side eye to Zappos, I decided to take drastic measures. Based on a customer review saying that the boot ran half a size larger than true size (even though I know differently because I tried them on in my size in the store and they fit perfectly) I ordered the LAST pair of 8.5s in the color of my heart's desire. I was willing to risk it, and with free two way shipping, I had nothing to lose.

But me being me, I wasn't satisfied. So I called the Nordstrom store that I originally tried the boots on--in New Jersey-- and that to date is the only store I have seen carry the color I want. And sure enough, they had one size 9 left! Success! But you see, the story doesn't end there. Nordstrom understands that customer service is EVERYTHING. The gentlemen on the phone first informed me that I was going to have to pay $10 for shipping--naturally, I was less than enthused. Sensing my frustration [and by sensing I mean, remembering my snippy comments about the lack of availability of common shoe sizes and the epic fail on the website for not carrying the color that I wanted] the customer service rep said he would see what he could do for me, considering I was already going to have to pay Maryland sales tax on my New Jersey purchase. Yeah, that's some bullshiggity. After about ten minutes, I learned that the guy on the other end of the phone, Craig, was a 20 year retired veteran of the U.S. Air Force, loved Chrisette Michelle, and that I MUST see her in concert (bonus points to you, sir!), that the Mary J. concert in NY last week was amazing, and that he had found a way to waive the shipping charge AND put double emphasis on the specific shipping address so that the lazy f*cktards at UPS don't "accidentally" deliver it to the wrong office building again. Because it was an over-the-phone order to a store, Craig also provided his employee information and store number, and assured that my credit card information would be destroyed as soon as the transaction processed.  Craig and Nordstrom, I tip my hat in thanks to you. Your efforts at efficient and pleasant customer service keep me returning to this very expensive retail establishment several times a year, without regret. I LOVE IT. But it keeps getting better. I had to cancel my order with Zappos, so I had to call their customer service. Immediately, an automated greeting picked up and offered a few option prompts. While the recording had a little too much sunshine in it for my tastes, [seriously, it was like Rachel freakin Ray was on the phone] I did appreciate having something to listen to rather than silence. The process to cancel my order was super easy, the agent was super nice [and yes, I was totally imagining her as one of the TV puppets while she talked] AND she offered me membership to Zappos VIP, which provides me with free overnight shipping on all my future purchases. I've never even ordered anything from them before, and I'm already getting perks. Score! I think they felt bad for not having my size. Their guilt is my gain, and their customer service reps were just so damn nice, it sounded like they actually like their jobs, and positive energy is contagious.

So today, instead of wanting to bitch slap someone over the phone, I was pleasantly surprised. It wasn't cheap, but you get what you pay for, and what I got is boots! Yay me! And I purposly haven't included a photo of the boots until I have them on my feet, struttin' around town.

*To further clarify, I know this is not a fashion blog. I would never consider myself a fashionista, mostly because I find the behavior of the fashion industry (and most fashion bloggers for that matter--even though I do follow several fashion blogs religiously) to be utterly ridiculous and/or reprehensible [size 00 gappy tooth white women as the standard of beauty?! FAIL!! Faux fur vests? Sleeveless coats? Socks with heels?! Please stop!]. On most days, I roll out of bed and leave my house looking like who shot John and went to work, because I no longer care. BUT, I do clean up real nice when I'm not dragging myself in to that crap hole I call my office. And I do love me some boots. And that my friends, is what matters.