Perfecting Perfection

Meatless Monday will be back once I stop eating EVERYTHING. 'Tis the season to be greedy, am I right?!

Speaking of the holidays, guess what's baaaaack! Brownies and Blondies! You may remember that several months ago I ventured into selling these treats on Etsy. I made a few sales, learned a few things and my life went a bit hectic and trying to get my little brownie business off the ground had to take a back burner. Well that is no longer the case. Things have settled and I'm back in business. During my time "off" I did some thinking about my core product, my piéce de résistance, my Beurre Noisette brownies. To date, the recipe that I use is awesome, regardless of if I flub the execution or not, the brownies are always slap yo' mama good. But as a very small business trying to make an name (and some cash) in the big world of Etsy, I realized that there is always room for improvement, and that even perfection can be perfected.

Now I'm no fool, when it comes to baking, I know there's very little room for change in measurements and proportions. Well actually, that's not true, because it took one "failed" batch of brownies [my roommate and I still ate them, trust!] to really learn not to play around with the measurements. Instead, I've learned to upgrade my ingredients. A brownie may be a humble confection, but even the humble deserve a luxury upgrade. And by luxury I mean Valrhona cocoa powder,  Kerrygold Irish butter, and toasted walnuts. And I have to say, the upgrades were worth the investment!

And in the spirit of giving, I'm offering 25% off any purchase in my Etsy shop, Browned Butter Sweets to my blog readers with the promo code EatReadRant. I'm in the process of revamping all of my recipes and photos, so I'll keep you updated on that progress. The above promotional code doesn't expire, and I have to say these brownies make great gifts!

NomNom, folks. And happy shopping!

Bourbon Vanilla Blondies + Giveaway= TGIF!

I don't know about you, but it's been quite a week for me. In the last five days, I have seriously considered quitting my job--twice, received my first acupuncture treatment, realized I have no choice but to pursue my plans for an Etsy shop lest I want to go to Spain with my old point n shoot, gotten about 20 hours of restful sleep, suffered through four nightmares, received my package for my CSN product review and found out that a 12" cast iron skillet is really fucking big, realized I lost my $10 bottle of mighty grip yet still attempted a pole split and didn't fall to my death (success pending on LOTS of stretching, mighty grip and a miracle), successfully made brownies and blondies of "insane greatness" and subsequently consumed half of each batch, thereby ingesting an estimated 3000 auxiliary calories that I'm sure will show up on my lower stomach three days before I leave for the beaches and men of Spain AND finally gave in to the feelings that I could no longer deny and admitted to myself and world via Facebook that I'm in love.........with Pauly D from Jersey Shore. Don't judge me.

So let's talk about those blondies. What's a blondie, you ask? Blondies are exactly what they sound like, which are a chocolate free, or "blonde" version of brownies. While a chocolate free version of any form of dessert may be considered sacrilege to some, it's a welcome variation on a American classic to others. I mean, even if you are a self proclaimed raging chocoholic connoisseur of fine cocoa based confections, can you really deny the awesomeness that results from combining browned butter is lust, brown sugar, bourbon, and vanilla extract?? I didn't think you could. Just admit it. It doesn't mean you love chocolate any less. I won't tell anyone. Scout's honor.



Beurre Noisette Brownies

Beurre Noisette (burr nwah-ZET):
-noun, French
a sauce of butter cooked until golden or toasty brown in color, producing a nutty aroma and flavor.

Buerre Noisette, or browned butter, is, as far as I'm concerned, the baking equivalent to rendered bacon fat.  An epicurean treasure of immeasurable value, it somehow makes the love that is butter even better, and could only have been gifted to the world by the French, who in my humble opinion, are the foremost authority on all things pastry and/or dessert. Don't believe me? Take a trip to Paris, and walk into any bakery or as they call them, patisserie shop, and tell me you don't want to eat everything you see. Or if you're fortunate enough to have an authentic patisserie shop nearby, you could just go there and order half a pound of raspberry macaroons and a pear tart resist the urge to order 1 of everything in the case. Bet you can't say that about your corner bakery. Don't get me wrong, I like desserts of many varieties and cultural origins, but nothing can hold a candle to French desserts. It is browned butter that was the key ingredient in this brownie recipe that ultimately convinced me to create my own shop on Etsy, and finally give life to my "side hustle" plans.

I wish I could say this recipe was an original creation, but I've already established that I'm no baking queen. However, I never met a recipe I couldn't alter, and contrary to popular belief, there is room for experimentation in baking, albeit not much. What changes did I make? Well if I told you, I'd have to kill you, and that wouldn't be good for business. Just know that these brownies were delicious perfection, and one lucky reader will be able to soon confirm that for free! But this isn't the giveaway post yet, this is just the teaser, cuz I'm a tease like that (but don't ask around to confirm that, lol). In the meantime, enjoy the gratuitous brownie making food porn

Sugar and Cocoa 

Chopped Walnuts

This is where the magic starts

A Glorious Beurre Noisette

As if I would let all that good go to waste 

Perfection!

Good to the Last Drop



{Source}

It was only a matter of time before I ran out of my beloved caramel vodka. Considering my obsession with all things caramel, and my appreciation for fine wine and spirits (read: booze lust), it's actually rather impressive that I managed to make this vodka last for six whole months! This was largely due to the fact that this particular libation held a sentimental value of sorts, as it represented my incredible time in España and Morocco last summer, and therefore was reserved almost exclusively for reminiscing with my partners in crime, Hillary and Alihah (my sister doesn't really do shots...silly grownup she is) and other close girlfriends. But sadly, all good things must come to an end, no? So here's to the Caramel Vodka! We had a good run, thanks for the incredible memories...

¡Salud!

Well you know how the saying goes, there's no use crying over spilled milk vodka? Well I took that literally, and have decided to buy several more bottles while I'M BACK IN SPAIN THIS MAY!! That's right, I'm going baaaaack! I can actually hardly believe it myself. Remember my cousin that we stayed with for part of our trip last year? Well, he was at Christmas dinner this year, and mentioned he was going back "home" to Spain to visit this spring, and extended the invitation. Or maybe I invited myself and he obliged (probably what happened), I can't remember exactly, but those details don't matter because my tickets have been purchased! This time around, our trip will be a little more low key. Rather than traipsing all over several cities, we'll be settling in Sevilla for eight days, half of which will be during the Feria del Caballo--The Festival of the Horse. Apparently, it's a big freakin deal, and most of  of Southern Spain will be the scene of one epic party. I'm so stoked, I literally did a happy dance when I bought my tickets!

Speaking of those tickets though...they weren't cheap. Which means I'm on a 30 day spending freeze, which I hope to extend another 30 days and so on and so forth because, now I HAVE to buy a DSLR camera. I can't fathom returning to Spain and taking grainy pictures with the hot Spanish men on the beach of the gorgeous scenery and all of my food with my little rinky dinky point and shoot. Me being me, I did some research, and have picked my gorgeous future new camera (see sidebar). So here's where I need your help. I need to you remind me that I'm not allowed to purchase non necessities for at least 30 days. That means no clothes/shoes/accessories, no make up (even though I really need to replace my mascara, but that can wait), no non grocery food, no kitchenwares (which means I have to stay far away from TJ Maxx and Marshalls) NADA! I'm counting on you guys to keep me in line, and help me resist the urge to spend, which I'm sure I'll be lamenting about about on Facebook...and Twitter! That's right, as of yesterday afternoon, I totally caved and entered the twitter (so follow me!). I'm working on a few ideas on how exactly I'm going to finance this camera purchase and stack spending cash, none which invovle selling the poodle, details to come in the future!

Oh, and please believe, I'll  be returning with a giveaway gift or two! :-D

Here's to the road twice traveled...

*squeal*

Forgive Me Sticky Buns

forgive me, I don't have a picture of the finished product

What would a Tuesday be without sticky buns? Well I don't know exactly, seeing as how I made these sticky buns on a Monday about 6 weeks ago. Shameful? yes! Delicious? Damn straight! As you may well know, I don't really dig baking. BUT as you also know, if I come across a dessert recipe that looks awesome and is relatively simple to prepare, I'll probably make it. In comes Keeley from My Life on a Plate and her kick ass sticky buns recipe, which she adapted from the queen of baking, no-- not Martha, but Ina! I don't know about you, but Martha Stewart is just too damn dry and boring for my liking. It's like watching a robot on TV, she's not personable, she's not funny, and she's not even overweight enough for me to believe that she eats half of what she cooks. Ina Garten, aka the Barefoot Contessa, on the other hand, isn't really funny either, but she's personable, appreciates the life enriching qualities of butter, lives in the freakin' Hamptons, grows rosemary bushes the size of a smart car in her back yard, is friends with fabulous Gays that write Hollywood screenplays for movies like Nine, AND she brings the art of simple french inspired dishes into the hearts and minds of gals like me each and every day, and I LOVE IT. I don't think you understand folks, I literally have a girl crush on a 62 year old overweight white woman because she makes coconut cupcakes that look so good they make me want to slap someone. Never mind that I've never actually tasted them, but that how good they look.

So anyway, back to these sticky buns. Several weeks ago, I had a meltdown of sorts, while at work. It involved the idiocracy that is the United States Postal Service, an expensive winter coat ordered from Asos.com and me not having my package. It was a Friday, I was tired, I was frustrated, I was LIVID, and I was inappropriately loud while on the phone with "customer service" trying to locate my lost package. After the dust had settled, and my package's location was still unknown, I felt bad about my little outburst. I decided to make it up to my fellow coworkers, and bribe them with butter, brown sugar, and cinnamon, there in lies the sticky buns.

Of course, I had to adapt the recipe for what I like and what's stocked in my pantry....

Nadette's Forgive Me -Keeley-Barefoot Sticky Buns

Ingredients
1 1/2 sticks unsalted butter (12 tbsp)
1/3 cup dark brown sugar, lightly packed
1/2 cup pecans, roughly chopped
2 sheets frozen puff pastry, defrosted (17.3 oz)

Filling:
2 tbsp unsalted butter, melted
2/3 cup dark brown sugar, lightly packed
3 tsp, freshly ground cinnamon

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Place a 12 cup standard muffing tin on a sheet pan, lined with parchment paper. [Actually, I don't have any parchment paper, so consider that optional]

In a bowl, combine 12 tbsp of butter and 1/3 cup brown sugar. Place 1 rounded tbsp of mixture in each of the 12 muffin cups. Distribute pecans evenly among muffing cups on top of butter and sugar mixture.

Gently unfold each sheet of puff pastry on a lightly floured surface. Brush entire sheet with melted butter leaving a 1 inch border on pastry sheet. Following the same 1 inch border, dust each sheet with 1/3 cup of brown sugar and 1 1/2 tsp of cinnamon. Starting with the end nearest to you, roll the pastry like ajelly roll around the filling, finishing with the seam side down. Repeat with second pastry sheet. Slice each roll into 6 equal pieces, each about 1 1/2 inches wide. Place each, sprial side down into the muffin cups to make 12 sticky buns.

Bake for 30 minutes, until sticky buns are golden to dark brown on top and firm to the touch. Do NOT make the same mistake I did, and try to bake each sticky bun in a paper muffin cups. I couldn't get a good picture of the finished product, and I spent another 20 minutes separating the paper cups from the sugary crusty goodness that the sugar and butter mixture creates. Instead, allow the buns to cool for a about 5 minutes, then invert the onto parchment or wax paper, and spoon topping and pecans out of muffin cups to top. In spite of the drama getting these sticky buns out of the paper cups, they were delicious, and my coworkers enjoyed them, and all was forgiven. These were so good in fact, that in spite the fact that i've probably consumed 10 pounds of sugar in total during the holiday season, I'll probably make these once more during the winter. I mean, really--brown sugar, butter, and cinnamon. How could I resist? And besides, I need to show you the finished product!

Raspberry Basil Mojito

It's official! Every one's favorite lush is back [and in boots]! Remember when I first started blogging, and would pair most of my meals with a potent potable of my own creation, as seen here, here, and here? Well I though it was high time I started putting booze in every other beverage, seeing as how my summer of Spain is long gone and it's only a short matter of time before winter will be here yet again, and I'm still an employee with the state of Maryland. Yeah....all I want for Christmas is a new job and a well stocked bar.

But back to the boozin'. Remember those frozen raspberries that I used to make my souffles and dolci pastelillos with? Well I still had some left in my freezer--actually it was just a few ounces of raspberry juice left that I couldn't bring myself to pour down the sink, and figured I would find a way to use it. I've also always wanted to experiment with a basil based mojito, and much to my amazement my basil plant is still alive. As you would imagine, I always have at least one bottle of liquor in my pantry, and as fate would have it, I still have Raspberry Rum in my freezer. *LIGHT BULB*

I was so psyched when I realized I had the makings of something wonderful, including my brand new mortar and pestle that I got from TJ Maxx for $12. Putting this together took all of two minutes. Pardon my lack of measurements, but this is me you're dealing with, so just guesstimate for your own drinks.

Ingredients
Raspberry juice/puree
White sugar
Basil
Raspberry rum
Cold water

Crush basil and sugar in mortar in pestle into a dry paste. [In hindsight, I would use less sugar, more basil and not entirely pulverize the basil leaves]. Combine paste with rum, raspberry juice and a splash of cold water, and shake vigorously.  [I think next time, I'll use club soda in place of water.] I loved this drink, the sweet savory notes of the basil were like music with the tart raspberry. And it was just so damn pretty! Shades of raspberry are my all time favorite colors, so it's only fitting that I enjoyed looking at this drink as much I enjoyed drinking it.

I currently have some frozen peaches, so I'm thinking of making another peach cobbler and some sort of peach/caramel vodka drink next. Here comes trouble :)

It's Pastelillos Tiiiiiiiime!

Oh yeah! Oh yeah! It's Pastelillos time!

What's so great about Pastelillos time? Well aside from my obvious reference to Jersey Shore [the most entertaining show on television and the greatest gift MTV has ever given the world] pastelillos are Puerto Rican meat pies, better known as empenadas, usually filled with chicken or pork, and deep fried. Need I say more? Me encanta la comida de Puerto Rico, but I can only get it when I'm home in Jersey, because much to my disappointment [but probably to the benefit of my wallet and waistline] there isn't much of a Puerto Rican community here in Baltimore. However, I'm convinced that after my Pandora's souffles fiasco, the universe is trying to make things up to me. Case in point, just last week, Keeley at My Life on a Plate made these delicious looking chicken empenadas. After reading the post, I immediately  wanted one several, and lamented these feelings in her comments section. Then right after I invited myself over to at dinner Keeley's house, I realized four things:

1.) I'm kind of a fat bastard, and while currently this is only a state of mind, it could very easily manifest itself physically if don't keep my shit in check.
2.) I totally had the ingredients to make my own pastelillos and I could save myself a two hour drive home and an awkward conversation with my mom about why I only came home for Puerto Rican food.
3.) That I'm not a fat bastard yet, and I can start keeping my shit in check right after I made these deep fried meat pies.
4.) Keeley is an alumni of my Alma mater, and she, Latoya, Hillary and I could totally have a blogger meet up spectacular at homecoming next weekend. Shazaam! [Go Blue Hens!]

I debated whether or not to buy pre-made pastry rounds or make the dough myself because I'm a lazy foodie, and would actually prefer not to make my own dough. But after watching Private Practice on Thursday and realizing that Friday was the kickoff to Halloween weekend, I decided to stay my single female ass indoors and make the dough myself. There's nothing like the fear of being assaulted on the street and losing my kick ass parking spot on a Friday night to shake the lazy right out of me. In fact, I'll preface this recipe right now by saying it was labor intensive. From the dough to the filling to not having the appropriate size pan for deep frying, I put in work for this dish. But it was a labor of love, and I'm quite proud of my MacGuyver kitchen skills. Don't act like you don't remember MacGuyver, he was bad ass, and I loved that show! With that said, this recipe is not authentically Puerto Rican in any way, but it was delicious!

Ingredients
Dough (adapted from Rican Recipes)

3 1/3 cup all purpose flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking powder
3 tbsp unsalted butter (cold, cut into cubes)
1 egg (well beaten)
3/4 cup cold water
1 tbsp vegetable oil
Vegetable oil (at least 32oz)

Mix flour, salt and baking powder. Cut the butter into the flour mixture. Whisk the egg and water, and oil together, and add liquid mixture to flour, thoroughly mixing with a fork, until you form a large dough ball. Set aside while making the filling.

Filling (a MacGuyver style original)
2 boneless pork chops, finely cubed
2 slices thick cut, apple wood smoked bacon, chopped
1/2 large onion, finely chopped
1 garlic clove, minced
Fresh ground black pepper
1 pinch saffron threads
1 tsp cumin
1 tbsp olive oil

Chop/mince the onion and garlic and set aside. Cutting up 2 medium pork chops into finely cubed pieces took considerable effort. Traditionally pastelillos are filled with ground or shredded meat, but since I don't own a functioning  food processor [I have pieces of one I got on freecycle, but that's a story for another day] I had to get old school with it. I have a new appreciation for pre-ground meet, pricey gadgets, and slavery [yeah, son]. Combine the chopped pork and chopped bacon with the seasoning, make sure meat is well coated. Heat olive oil in a heavy skillet on medium high heat, and add onion and garlic. Saute about three minutes, then add meat, cook about 4-5 minutes. Remove from heat, set aside.

Take dough, and cut into 10 pieces. Work each piece with a rolling pin [or in my case, an empty wine bottle that I saved as a souvenir from España] into the size of a small plate. Add 2 tbsp of meat filling per pastelillo, coat the edge with a little water and fold over. Seal edges with a fork. When oil is hot [365F for those with frying thermometers] submerge one pastry into oil. Cook about two minutes on each side or until golden brown and crisp. Remove from oil and place on a plate with paper towels to absorb oil.

But wait, there's more!

I ran out of meat with two rolled out pastries left. Then I had one of those light bulb moments that I love. I remembered I had some left over frozen raspberries from the souffles and some marscarpone cheese.

Dolci Pastelillos
3oz raspberries
3oz marscarpone cheese
1/2 tsp fresh shaved cinnamon
2 tsp sugar

Combine ingredients in a bowl and spoon mixture into pastry rounds. Fold over and press sealed with a fork. Fry in hot oil about two minutes on each side. Remove from oil, and let cool on paper towels. Drizzle with remaining raspberry juice.

I don't think I have to tell you how damn good this entire meal was. Oh and in case you're wondering what those greens on my plate were, it was Swiss chard sauteed in rendered bacon fat and black pepper. I may have a problem when it comes to bacon. But fear not, in the face of my obvious unhealthy obsession with bacon, I'm putting the bacon in the freezer and going vegetarian for the next week or two.

(Pandora's) Raspberry Souffles

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Caramel Vodka Peach Cobbler

I have a confession to make. I don't like baking very much. It's an ironic thing for me to not like baking, because some of my earliest food memories involve me helping my mom make her awesome pound cake for Thanksgiving, and eating the batter left in the bowl [mmmm cake batter].  Christmas time means red velvet cake, and since my grandmother's Alzheimer's diagnosis several years ago, Odichi and I have been charged with making this labor intensive cake, Georgia style, with three layers and pecans and coconut in the icing. So it's not like I don't know how to bake, I just don't like to bake. Baking requires precision, focus, and patience, three qualities that I famously lack, and don't really have any desire to add to my personality repertoire, in spite of the fact that they would probably make me a better person [as if I need to improve on thiiiiiis].

However, I will occasionally disregard my disdain for baking when I think it's worth it. And two weeks ago, I came across a blueberry cobbler recipe on Keeley's My Life on a Plate blog that made me remember that I love cobbler. Cobbly Cobbler Cobbler. Here it goes down. Down in my belly. Mmm Mmmm Mmm. It was also an oddly cool and grey day in August, which meant I could turn on my oven. I was sold! Me being me, I went straight to Whole Check Foods after work to buy blueberries, and left with peaches instead.  I decided on peaches because I prefer peach cobbler to any other fruit and I'm a diabolical booze hound genius and realized that peaches would make the best medium in which to incorporate my beloved caramel vodka. I also heavily debated between Häagen-Dazs dulce de leche or plain vanilla ice cream. Vanilla won, only because they had the single itty bitty ones in vanilla, and I wasn't in the mood to spend $5 on half of pint of ice cream that day.  Next time, I'm going all caramel though, budget be damned!

Ingredients (adapted from Keeley)

Filling:
7 large peaches, peeled and roughly chopped
1/3 cup dark brown sugar
1/3 cup Caramel Vodka (you know I didn't actually measure it)
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon finely grated lemon zest
1/3 freshly grated cinnamon stick*
Pinch of salt

Topping:
1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/3 cup sugar
2 teaspoon. baking powder
1/2 freshly ground cinnamon stick
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 egg
1/2 cup buttermilk
6 tablespoons (3/4 stick) unsalted butter, melted and cooled
1/2 tsp. vanilla extract** (I omitted b/c I didn't have any)


Preheat an oven to 375ºF. Lightly grease a pie/baking dish***

Toss the peaches with the vodka, sugar, flour, lemon zest and salt until blended. Pour into the prepared baking dish. In a bowl, mix dry flour, sugar, baking powder, cinnamon and salt. In another bowl, whisk together the egg, buttermilk, butter and vanilla until well blended. Pour the egg mixture into the flour mixture and, using a rubber spatula, fold gently until the flour is moistened and the mixture forms a soft dough. Drop spoonfuls of the dough onto the filling, spacing them evenly; the dough won't completely cover the filling.

Bake until the filling is bubbling, the topping is browned and a toothpick inserted into the topping comes out clean, about 40-45 minutes, depending on the deepness of your pie dish. Serve warm with ice cream, and eat your heart out. I sure did.

While I thoroughly enjoyed eating more than half of this cobbler by myself [and then rightly gave the rest to my sister], next time around, I'm going to make some changes, mainly in the crust. I like the biscuit like topping, but what I really wanted was a pie-like thick and flaky crust. So now to find the perfect pie crust recipe. For the filling, I'll let the peaches soak in the vodka for a full day, and add some corn starch to thicken the filling. Mmmm peachy...

*I bought a huge bag of whole cinnamon sticks at my local Indian market for $3. I went nuts in that store that day!

**I have yet to buy my Madagascar Bourbon vanilla extract b/c it's like $15. But one day soon...

***I forgot to grease my baking dish. I suck at following instructions. smh