Chick Pea Patties. They're kind of self explanatory, right? Ok, they're really not, but it seems my creative writing skills seem to be on hiatus at the moment. So sadly, I have no quippy vignette about my life, no cynical musings about the state of our society, no absurd commentary on why I think veganism is quite possibly a cult--I got nothing for you.
Well except for these chickpea patties, of course. And while they were in fact quite tasty, I could never suggest that they are adequate meat replacement, in the way several recipes that I came across during my research called for. I mean, c'mon, veggieheads! Pulverized chickpeas formed into a patty form and served between two pieces of bread does not a burger make. That's just a slap in the face to all the sacrificial cows and corresponding meatheads who reaped the delicious benefits of their sacrifice! I'm just sayin.
But speaking of pulverized chickpeas, I guess I could talk about the fact that I still do not possess a food processor. Do you realize what that means?
It means that I chopped two, 15oz cans of chickpeas by hand. And chopping little round wet chickpeas for the better part of an hour was kind of a miserable experience. F%^#$% horrible!
Chickpea Patties with Yogurt Sauce (adapted from Wonderful Joy Ahead)
1 cup Bread Crumbs
1 1/4 cups 2% Greek yogurt
6 scallions, sliced thin
1/4 Cup fresh mint, thinly sliced (chiffonade)
2 15 oz cans chickpeas, rinsed
2 large eggs
6 tsp good quality extra virgin olive oil
1 Tsp garam masala
1 Tsp cumin
1/2 small onion, minced
1 lemon, zested and juiced
1 Tsp black pepper
In a small bowl, 3/4 cup of the yogurt, 2 tbs of the scallions, lemon zest, lemon juice and 1 tbs of mint. Season with salt and pepper to taste, cover, and refrigerate until ready to serve.
Pulse the chickpeas in a food processor about 8 times until you have a coarse puree with large pieces still remaining. In a medium bowl, whisk together the eggs, 2 tbs of olive oil, garam masala, cumin, salt and pepper. Add to the bowl the chickpeas, breadcrumbs, remaining 1/2 cup yogurt, onion, remaining scallions, and remaining mint. Mix gently until just combined.
Form 1 inch thick patties with about 1/2 cup of chickpea mixture each, yielding 6-10 patties.
On medium heat, heat 2 tsp of oil in large and heavy skillet. When oil is hot, place 3-4 of the patties into the skillet. Cook until well-browned on each side, about 5 minutes per side. Transfer cooked patties to a plate and tent with foil. Repeat until all patties are cooked, adding additional oil as needed.
Serve with a dollop of yogurt sauce and enjoy.
And remember, this is not meant to substitute a real burger. I can't stress that enough.